Why do I keep feeling like changing my name and stuff ?

wyoming 4/28/2024 09:03 pm 239

So I previously went by Rory but idk I feel like I've just gotten "tired" of that name even though I still like it but I sorta feel like I've "exhausted" the name and needed a new one so I'm going by Veronica now. Idk how soon I'll get tired of Veronica (or if I ever will) but I want to know if there's a reason why I feel like this? Feeling like I get tired of names and need to start going by a new one? Idk like is there a term for that and is it okay ???

Sometimes I feel like going like multiple names and sometimes just 1. Sometimes I'll put an alternative name that people can call me and I don't really have a preference for which name they use.

I also feel the same way abt pronouns, I went by xe/xer , fae/faer and vo/void for a while but now I feel like they're not really for me. I really liked them at the start but now eh. Idk, i just feel like every once in a while my identity needs to be "renewed" and switched out for a "better" one that I like more like how I dropped certain pronouns and names. Is there a term for that and does anyone else feel that way ?

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harpyqueen
Member

Apr 29, 2024 3:47 pm

@N1GHTFALL: hell yes that's so sick! It's cool to meet someone else who does this too, I only started using more than one name a few months ago but it's been awesome so far :3

harpyqueen
Member

Apr 29, 2024 3:46 pm

@wyoming: I think my best answer might be that you don't nessecarily need a label for exactly what you're feeling!

It's nice to have words for what you're experiencing, esp when sharing with other people. Maybe your gender doesn't change, and you don't fit genderfluid, but your name doesn't have to be a gender thing! Names and pronouns can be very meaningful and affirming, but in the end there's no one gender that can claim certain pronouns or names.

Maybe you just like having multiple names, and it doesn't have to relate to your gender at all! Or maybe it does, but not in a way you've seen labelled in a way you connect with, so make your own label! Or it is part of your gender, but you decide not to use a label. There's tons of options.

If you keep looking, tho, I'm also sure there's a label out there for you. So many people are coining and creating labels that fit them, and most love when other people also use them!

Just don't stress too much. It's good to try an figure out what you are feeling, but in the end you can just use whatever names you want and not have to justify it with genders, labels, or anything else. Pick what makes you happiest!

N1GHTFALL
Member

Apr 29, 2024 10:59 am

@harpyqueen: can confirm, i also use different names for my different genders

wyoming
Member

Apr 29, 2024 10:10 am

@harpyqueen: ty, I definitely have thought I was genderfluid b4 but I don't really feel like my gender changes, just my name/pronouns. Idk what my gender is, but I don't think it changes. Or if it does, it's so subtle I can't even tell. The only way I can really describe my gender is "my gender" lmao. I tend to use neopronouns that feel feminine even if they're not intended to be, since I'm a very feminine person. I used to use fae/faer bc they felt feminine, and they still do, but they're just not for me anymore, so I've moved on to just star/stars. I used to not like she/her that much but now I don't mind them. Idk. I really liked Rory at the start but now I don't fully feel like it was "me" and Veronica feels more right. But who knows, I might even get tired of Veronica. there's a lot of names I like and might use at some point. Or names that I might use alongside my current one. idkkkkk man

harpyqueen
Member

Apr 29, 2024 9:47 am

I've seen alot of trans / nonbinary people say they feel drawn to different names at different times and for different reasons. You can use multiple names and change them up however much you feel like!

I second the thought that you might want to look into genderfluid or flux because multiple names are pretty common in that community. As a genderfluid person myself, I actually have a name that feels right for each of my genders! I don't use all of them right now, but I have met people who wake up every day and decide which name to use that specific day based on which gender they are feeling, and they let their friends/family/etc know every morning what name to use.

You deserve to be called whatever name you want, and you can make it as complicated or as simple as you want. There's nothing wrong with recognizing you liked your old name and it has served you well, but now it's time to pick a new name that fits you right now.

Good luck!

oakeypokeykandi
Member

Apr 28, 2024 9:18 pm

could be some form of genderflux/fluid! i’m pretty sure there’s also pronounfluid/flux and namefluid/flux

https://gender.fandom.com/wiki/Genderfluid

https://pronoun.fandom.com/wiki/Pronounfluid

https://queerdom.fandom.com/wiki/Namefluid#:~:text=Namefluid%2C%20also%20called%20nomifluid%20or,time%20from%20hour%20to%20hour.

Why do I keep feeling like changing my name and stuff ?

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